Bowel Movement Church Proverbs

I'm happier than a dung beetle in a manure pile.
That's the bean soup talking.
You can tell by the smell.
Send your children to church. Keep your turds at home.
TAKE a dump. LEAVE a fart.
Never trust a man who won't own up to his own farts.
Don't flush that turd. It's needed at home.
If I'm lying, Mother Bombard can't make bean soup.
If you can see your compost pile, you know you're home.
A child's discipline should be like a stool... firm.
Light it or smell it, but by all means fart it.
Children should keep their mouths shut, and their sphincters open.
There are two things that are abominations on the earth...sin and flush toilets.
Let your words enrich the world as manure enriches the earth.
May your thunder mug echo with mighty flatulence.